Dream Jobs: My Version

I pulled an all-nighter and just finished an essay for my class this morning. As I put the freshly printed paper into my English binder I find out the Professor marked, no class, on the schedule for today. Durrrr. I am still pepped up on college-last-minute-energy so before I crash read a cute list of my Dream Jobs. Entitled, well, Dream Jobs.

I read an interesting article on Cracked recently, 6 Dream Jobs That Would Actually Suck and felt like they missed a couple. Plus I can do better, I am better. Honestly, I have always had a personal imaginary list of specific jobs (I am still aiming for by the way) that I want when I decide to grow up (Someday). I mean who doesn't? But I am still young and even in my profile I write I am not set on a career yet. Hell, I am still a student and everything, but the more time slips by the less dreamy your job life becomes and the more real working as a wage slave for some ABC crap company becomes a reality (Do not hate me future employer).

-Writer-

(I always hated that dam bird)

Such an open career. Yet I read about all these self-made authors out there making it big with little to no background prior (Harry Potter and Twilight author's for example) besides a simple degree and passion for the genre they write for. The only problem with this career is that it takes a real passion for writing more so then a daily idea or two. I already know many people with books out, even my father has written a good book or two in the days. I think what people really want as a writer is to write scripts or a famous original/stolen idea book with an amazing movie deal. In the writing world I think it would be much worse. My father being a writer he spends most of his time doing everything but write and writing plenty of things personal to himself for little to no money or fame. So really as a writer I have had jobs writing articles for companies and my own short stories. This probably started when I got pressured to do homework for cute girls back in school, but still no real fame or money. As good of a writer as I will ever be the reality is only a handful of writers are ever published and ever really make money with little pressure. For any aspiring writers step 1 is to skip being a teacher at all costs, because you will forget your dream. Step 2, is to walk into a used bookstore and realize there are a million and one books you have never heard of. How does your dream job sound to you now? Get a day job!!

-Game Designer-

(GD, at a convention no doubt)

Maybe more of a guy thing, but the more into the future we go this is becoming more of a common interest for women and non geeky-nerdish people. I have too many useless ideas and some good ones for game design. I use to brainstorm almost everyday back at my old job on how to improve my companies game. Of course it helped, but on the small scale if anything. What a designer really does is make a game from the ground up or help drastically improve a failing game or franchise looking for more money. I would expect this to be very stressing, but so much fun if I ever get the chance. Only problem is the catch-22, you need to make a game or hold a high position. Basically money. If you make or have some money plus experience in game design, this is the job for you. Otherwise like me start from scratch and become a game artist, coder, or tester. Do something in the game industry to pull yourself up. This is still a very clean-cut method similar to an apprenticeship. The only thing wrong with those is that unlike an aspiring Blacksmith career where you only train to become one thing; an aspiring Game Designer could end up into a funnel of career paths. Best to keep your day job clear, because if you like games and want to make them make sure you love all the other jobs including game designer before you lead an entire team of game professionals at your whim. Best of luck, some for me to.

-Professional Athlete- (Race Car Driver, Runner, Blah-Blah Blank)

(Burn baby, burn)

Race car driving and Running have always been my side interest. Usually the first thing a baby wants to play with is a toy car. Even my nephew goes crazy for toy cars. And running is something common in my family. Hell, it is common in your first Gym class. But to be a professional is the one thing that distinguishes a man from a woman in my book (As sexist as I can be) besides the whole penis vagina biology. Street Races, NASCAR, the Olympics; the dream. Of course racing around the dam NASCAR track over and over is really boring. I can hardly watch it on ESPN. As a runner it is fun at first to race people, but there is a really steep experience curve to becoming a professional. Especially to beat Africans even if I am half. Maybe I will run again, but to think professionally will just kill the runner's high. This goes double for race car driver unless I have money to spend on a car and pit crew.

-Train Driver- (AKA Railroad Engineer)

(Good old BART)

This job has been dumbed down through the years and even I knew it was crap as a kid. But I have always had a passion for trains even if I mean messing with the wooden train set at the dental office. A kid dream, and yet it is shitty and boring in real life, I am guessing. But how often do you get a chance at a dinner table to tell your blind date you are the guy blocking traffic at the railroad stops? Not often, because it is not the dream job for everyone does not mean it would not be fun. Only thing that really kills this for me is taking the BART everyday to find out these BART driver people are regular Joe's who hardly have an AA degree or make decent pay. A big, sigh, to that.

-Entrepreneur-

(This is Pro)

An annoying word for own and start a business. Pretty open career move here, but it really is prolific for anyone. There is not one person who has never tried being their own boss and it is usually by accident. The thing that is a dream job killer for me is that you really have to start a company from the ground up with an original or highly desired product/skill to be making the green. Or else you and myself included are a set of regular nobodies on the bottom of the Forbes's list making chump change owning the McDonald's down the street or the crap store alternative. Entrepreneur? I never met the girl.

-Film Actor-/Director/Everything else popular with Film

(Perfect, but this time - Better)

Who doesn't want to be on the big screen at least once? And since this is the career I focus on now I have a little insight. It starts out with so many doorways and slowly becomes the, I just want to do good, job. I mean how many films have you seen in the past 2 or 3 years that were not complete crap? Very few I am sure. On top of that how many other forms of video have you seen and ever asked who stars in that commercial or who wrote that wedding video script? Very unlikely. But this is how it is. 1% of the market (Internationally) make millions while everyone else in the film and even theater business make less than 20k a year doing crap for ABC company (You cannot escape it). No matter how luxurious the job my sound; you, me, and the whole dam world are going to be working a shitty job. Film just gives an end product worth showing off to people every once in a while.

-Stand-Up- Comic

(I made this poster!)

OK now this is a career move that is a pure dream for most. The best or worst thing is most people never see it coming or even ask for this job. Most people I am sure either hate comedians or rarely pay any attention to comedy. I mean who thinks of comedy as a group of people telling lame jokes (Not me...psh). But that is exactly what it is. Bad jokes, without the bad jokes and bad comedians you do not have the semi-good and one time jokesters who make listening through all that crap worth it. The only question is do you want to try your luck at getting heckled and shit on at an open-mic? I do, but most people rather do the heckling. Shit, most people do not even like stand-up 90% of the time. Only issue is that personally, I think a lot of stand-up is real 1-sided and it is not that funny. So the window is very small for me especially to be a comedian making money or just another pie in the face asshole ruining a dates night at the open-mic for entertainment.

• Honorable Mention
  

Astronaut

This was already mentioned in the Cracked article and I agreed with them. You need a PHD and near perfect body. Not to mention 10+ years of experience towards NASA. And I thought 2/3 years of experience was too much for work.

Photographer

I think taking erotic pictures of woman would be awesome especially the artsy photos sometimes. But what about the boring head shot photographers that rule the world? Fuck.

Travel the world - Insert job title here

I know a lady, my neighbor who goes all over the world testing out her companies product. A shit job, but easy and when she is done for the day she gets to chill in a new country. Although you live out of a suitcase and go to places in the world that you never thought of going to before and will not like. It is not all a vacation.

I think the best way to treat a dream job is not as impossible or necessarily possible. Treat it as a hobby or a passion you have. Dedicate some time to it like you should be doing right now for exercise, a diet, or a book. Really dig into the career and with the Internet it is not too hard these days. Do not be a one trick pony, but do not be a jack of all trades (Master of none). There is nothing wrong with being a teacher for 10 years and that being all you know or do. Its called work. Just do it. But do not give up your dreams even if it means you want to be a dinosaur or the God of a virtual world. Hell I even wanted to be a crack dealer in the third grade and started out by selling mushrooms I found in the grass for a dime. I got busted, but at least I tried.

- Peace