The Bat Cave

Dateless

Dateless

I remember hating fairs, carnivals, and Carnies. So... one night I go to a 'Funfair' with some friends. I was the only dateless guy there, basically single, with a troupe of couples. I do not remember much except arriving in a long line for some spinning ride to Hell, it was not the dipper. When it was my turn to get into the rusty cage I failed to realize the two person requirement. I tried to calmly back away but the Carny said, "Come on son get in! You waited for this." I bravely replied, "No, its cool" and tried to walk to the exit where I could meet my friends later. Suddenly, a group of girls behind me stalled me with their aura, "Where are you going vanilla chocolate" one blond said. Keep in mind, my friends along with several other people were already on the ride waiting for me to make up my damn mind. "Hes good," the blond said to the Carny as she grabbed my arm and forced me into the rusty trap. 

The doors locked and I swallowed my resistance, she was being kind right? We went up high into the sky and she stared into my eyes. I think she wanted to share a deep gaze of wonder and that is when I thought to myself, "I'm getting laid tonight." She really only said one thing that has still stuck in my mind to this day, "Don't throw up on me, OK babe?" This was about the time I felt a spiking pain in my stomach, was it love? I resisted any contact with her during the whole ride as I gripped my stomach with my weak little hands. She had cursed me with those words "OK Babe?" Although, it was probably not those two. This shared moment was hopeless, me dateless, and she... she seemed cool. 

As the ride came to a close and the Carny slowly let couples out one-by-one, I tried not to swallow the puke that had surfaced. I was going to break the bond I had shared with this blond. I bravely held the horror creeping out of my mouth as best I could. Each couple that left the ride tilted the cage and my stomach. I felt the purge from within and the demon was quickly released from the depths of despair. I held my it in my mouth as best I could, but that seemed to only make it worse. It was our turn to exit and I could see the Carny give a little smile as he slowly opened the gate. I still do not know why, but it was at this moment, I turned towards the blond and threw up on her. 

"It was not meant to be," a friend later told me as I threw up some more in the back of the Funfair. In all honesty, I probably made her night. After the fire from within was extinguished and the blond long gone, I walked away proudly... to the nearest bathroom. I naturally had to freshen up.

Just to be clear...

To the editor,

I was so excited the first day I started up Ninthlobby.com even wording it Ninth Lobby and all. I disappoint myself by failing to post something every week and even missing the make-up posting the following week, so clearly explained in my pledge.

Enough of that, henceforth I am changing the format of my website and will be posting new fresh content in a timely manner. Now this could mean a lot, a little, or nothing every week, but it is all intentional, a facade!

- Thank You and God Bless America

Blog Excuse of the Week

The topic of discussion is my sickness. I am sick this week (Nothing horrible) and if anyone remembers way back with my - first post - I said that if I missed blogging for a week I would explain why. Well this is that time and really a first for not writing something entertaining for Ninthlobby (Even though this technically counts). Now my excuse is pretty tame. An original story to explain why I am so lazy this week. I shall call this post, The Excuse for the Week.

The Excuse for the Week:

I just got back from Humboldt County, just shy of the 4/20 date. I spent the past weekend celebrating a good friends birthday, but something went terribly wrong. After only one night of bar-hopping, I woke up with the sniffles and a sore throat. I tried to ignore the problem, but my body got weaker and my sniffles worse till I returned home dead on Sunday. Remarkably, when I returned to the San Francisco Bay Area I felt better. But I think it was a Placebo Effect. Sure enough, Monday I woke up sick again but this time my head was pounding, my throat dry, and my bones felt crumbly and useless. I went from a mild flu to a head cold. Although, my health is slowly returning, but a few other things are bothering me that should really only be affecting an old war vet... This week I am going to see a doctor for a full checkup followed by catching up on a few weeks worth of backed up homework.

There, done. That is my excuse.

Now I think the excuse is quite valid, but this is not to say I was not prepared for blogging or writing. I keep busy. I am trying something different and a little more upscale than normal. At the moment, I am working on a script inspired by my open discussion with Francis Ford Coppola at my college this past month. It was after watching his first [un-scary] horror film D-13, which you can bare witness to quick writing-on-the-spot and static-shot-boom-in-the-frame directing; that really pushed me. Made me think “I can write this, but better” You can see D-13 all over the web ( Try here).

My script is similar. A horror about an old tradition that should not be scary at all, but I am putting my own twisted humor into it. Once I get past 50-90+ pages I will start a blog about my progress with the whole project. I feel good about finishing it up, soon...ish. After this week of course, because I am really motivated about the content (Secret).

Finally, I am writing an article with my friend Kramer ( He has a blog here). He is a close friend who was inspired to start blogging by my amazing articles; like this one. Please hold the applause. Our duo article is about personality types in men and women. When we finish (Which will be by the end of the month) we will be submitting it to Cracked for loads of cash in return. It does not matter if they accept it or not. I will make sure to post it here for my friends, family, and of course myself (Or the link if Cracked buys it) for everyone to read. It will be life changing and drop dead funny (Entertainment for the Gods). This article will be a cross between my Attraction Checklist and Kramer's Ideal girlfriend.

Hope everyone had a great 4/20 and take it easy. Next week will be worth the wait.

Editing, The Piece, Again

From, The Piece

During the summer of last year I had worked on a personal project of my own. Technically my first short film. But I have worked on and made a few before that led me to this one. Every independent short film has its issues. This is what makes it independent right? Lack of experience, time, money, stress. The list goes on, but for my own project I expected better. So in early August of 2008 I created my short, The Piece. I had used resources like friends, Craigslist, and my ever growing network to get it completed. From the very beginning I had a goal in mind. To create a short film, improve my experience as a filmmaker, and setup a reel. The final result was a disappointment. For one I was not sure what I had created and the final outcome was much different than the original idea. Although it is possible that somewhere down the line while I was switching hats as the: producer, writer, D.P., Gaffer, Actor, Director, Editor, VFX designer, and Sound designer that I may have lost my way. A vision is so hard to foresee when you have to worry about a crews lunch and the shooting schedule over the aesthetics of a single scene. This is not to say I did not have a reliable crew or experienced talent. I just did not use them effectively and my lack of experience was proof as I fumbled from scene to scene. So what I ended up with last year is the final film below. It caused many disappointments from the people who worked with me and took me a while to figure out why.

Now it is 2009 and I have not done another project of my own since. Fear is possible, but I guess I just needed to figure out why it sucked (Piece by piece). The first thing I could think of was that it is way too long. The problem with being in so much creative control is no limit. I had no limit as to what I would cut or not. Second, the content and the acting was weak. This made sense since I am not a professional actor and the talent who worked with me had a day or less to prepare. Also the script was a simple adaption from a prior project rushed with no dialogue tweaking or influences of professionalism to make it an Oscar winner. I also tried to make it as original as possible to avoid comparing my project with someone else. Finally the short is very confusing and the whole structure loose. There was nothing holding it together. No cool lighting or scene. I needed something.

From, The Piece

So after much consideration and a weekend or two sober nights alone in my editing room on Final Cut Pro I re-edited my short film. It is shorter, the quality improved, and the whole plot tighter. I added more effects, polished a few things here and there, and my personal favorite; color corrected a few things. I know one thing for sure and that is crap with a paint job is still crap. But I understand my film better and this new edit is what I was really trying to say as best as I could with the material I had. Keep in mind I did not have the raw footage anymore since my computer crashed, but I made due. Below is my newly edited short film with a brief synopsis accurately depicting the plot. Enjoy.



Synopsis
After a girl acknowledges interest in a young man he attempts to summon the courage to pay interest back but not before he goes on a trip within his head to discover and interpret his feelings.

The Piece (2009 Edit), Short Film
Written and Directed by Shan Howerton
Starring: Shan Howerton, Stephanie Walker, Catherine Kim Poon
Running Time: 4 min.
Camera: HVX200
Format: 24p, 16:9, HDTV Widescreen

So I can finally put my short film to rest. As far as my fear goes I can say only one thing and it is that what I went through is necessary as I climb to the top.

Small steps. Big breaks.

- Peace

A Little Visit to Utah

Thank You Google. For all the free pictures

Yay! Today is V-day and I am back in good old California. Back from my trip to Provo, Utah visiting a few friends. For those that do not know Salt Lake City and Provo are predominately Caucasian and Mormon territory. My friends being these two fit right in. I was invited to go see my friends up at BYU back in January and thought of going to evade my failed attempts of getting a job and trying stand-up comedy.

Now me being half black & white technically an Egyptian, Jewish, Irish, Native American with an Afro. I stood out. But BYU (Where I mainly was) is also known as the friendliest college campus in America so it did not matter much. It just meant more hello's for me. As you can see with the random google picture of Provo to the left everyone is happy and white. They are probably just happy to be white.

I was in and out of Utah fairly quickly, but I hope I can recall my whole adventure. I took pictures, but not enough. I think I need to buy my own camera one of these days that is easy to pick up and also store.

• The Flight

So as a poor, hungry, and sex deprived college student I flew to Salt Lake City with the finest yet cheapest airlines I could manage. US Airways and Delta were for me. Very cheap service, but who cares? A flight is a flight. I usually pass out half the time I fly anyways. This was my 3rd or 4th time flying (First time solo) and I was really not into it. I mean I liked gazing outside the window and even attempting to get past security with no license was fun, but my focus was else where. I mainly zoned out all 7-10 hours it took to get me there (Long delays).

• Arrival

I arrived late at night in Salt Lake City or the holy land as I like to call it (Well the Mormons do). I was really tired and it was pretty cold. My old high school friend, Kim, picked me up with her boyfriend Jason. It was an hour drive to Provo so we mainly caught up with casual chit chat. I was also pretty tired so half the things they said to me I muttered back with unreasonable answers and random stories. It worked out. Especially with their low toned and polite voices it was hard to tell if I was insulting them or entertaining them. Neither would have surprised me.

• The Dorm

Kim dropped me off at my friends Jon and Dustan's dorm which also included a variety of roommates (4 others, but I still saw more come and go).

Dustan was the one showing me around

My room, well the couch

The view outside

The first night was not too shabby. Everyone in the dorm was watching The Dark Knight. A movie I previously rated as one of the best in my January blog. I was mainly planning out the rest of the week's activities with Dustan. We planned to Ski ASAP and also visit them in class. Just like old times. Both sounded like fun. I was really jet-lagged so I passed out at my normal time (4am, I think).

• Skiing at Sundance

So the very next day me and Dustan headed up to the local Ski resort, Sundance! It was an amazing place full of tall mountains, fresh powder, and amazing trails. I skied naturally and Dustan snowboarded. I tried snowboarding once that day which was a great mistake (I would rather forget that moment in time). We mainly went down blues, but I think I killed myself down a few black diamonds. Dustan was amazing and I struggled a bit back and forth down the mountain. I managed. I really love skiing and I started taking more control of turning especially with the poles. This was my 5th time and I think I am good enough to say I am an intermediate skier. Still slow down the mountain, but slow and steady. I am just cautious. I am not the best on the lift though. I knocked Dustan off a lift by accident probably because I was just not paying attention. I think I just sat too close to him. I was showing love in a dangerous way. But it was in the beginning of the lift so he slipped off more like the first death in Jurassic Park (That made it seem worse).

Anyways here are some pictures of that day:

As you can probably tell from the pictures we spent more time on the lifts. Although it is a nice cool down I wish I could just teleport to the top. That would be amazing. Anyways it was a great day to bond with Dustan who I have had some rough times in the past with. But I have been friends with him for a great length of time now and he was really the first high school friend I made and kept hanging out with. He is even getting hitched soon. I am proud to say good luck to him. Good luck Dustan. Or maybe I need some luck. Meh, whatever.

• The Rest of the Trip

So after the whole arrival and ski adventure the rest of the trip was pretty tame. I went to class with my friends, but I was so sore and tired from skiing to really participate. I slept in Jon's astronomy class and sang a song in Kim's chasity class. Well I took some notes, but it was to no avail. My thoughts were between skiing and eating. I even went to a few dance classes, but I really, really am not a dancer. I like dancing with friends with good music, but that is it. On my last day I also went to the Salt Lake City temple and checked out a couple tourist attractions. But I almost missed my flight because of it. But it was worth it to see the hot Sister missionaries (Yes, I am going to Hell) and the pimp artwork of Jesus and friends kicking some Ass.

• The Nightmare
  

The day after skiing and between classes I chilled at Kim's house after going to her chasity (Marriage and Family) class. It was nice to see her friends, roommates, and even her place, but I was way tired. I passed out uncomfortably on yet another couch (I will die on a couch one day) as Jon came over to do some homework while Kim did what she does best. I did not have a punchline for that last sentence. Anyways as I slept I had a very weird dream.

A nightmare.

I was with Kim on a bright sunny day at a festival near a forest. We were walking around checking out the artwork of nature. Kind of like checking out the art of clouds. Every once in a while I kneeled down to check out a tree or a cool thing-a-jig in the forest that looked interesting. Each time I would pull Kim down with me (On accident) to whisper something private about the art in her ear. She would smile and this went on for a while (Except we were not just whispering, cough). Inbetween all this her boyfriend who was Zac Efron for some reason would get in the way and try to break us up. Although we were just being harmless friends trying to enjoy the art in my whacky dream.

Eventually I got pushed out by Zac (Singled out is more like it) and my friend Jon told me to run before I got hurt. I did and immediatley fell into a moving train. Kind of like the BART. On the train I went from cabin to cabin (Train sections) trying to get away from the danger behind me (Kim's boyfriend or something worse?). I stopped at the final cabin full of weird FBI looking people in the dark. They were all looking out a single window with a camera and other high tech gear focused on the events outside (I was not looking out the window yet). I looked across this cabin to see the Operator driving the BART but instead saw a demon looking thing in the reflection of the door. I consciously knew I was now in a nightmare. Just great. As I stared at the demon I felt like I was sucked in for a second towards it and slowly I looked away. The next instance another human was teleported to a seat near the window but also transfixed on what was going on outside. Feeling stuck I sat down near him avoiding the demon and looked outside. I saw a dark city moving past me quickly. I did not know at first what it was, but I knew it was familiar. A tall city like bulding came by us and I looked into it to see the filming of a Snuff or porn like film (This was a nightmare after all). I will not go into details of what I saw, but at the end of the dream everyone was staring at me and I felt my body go into a sudden panic. I woke up to my phone vibrating. My dad called me about my court case next week. He saved me.

I am not sure exactly why I dreamed this, but I do know for sure it was relevant and that the city I saw was Korea. South Korea to be exact. My future or maybe another metaphor? Who knows. If anything I was disappointed to know I am still having nightmares. Especially at BYU of all places and next to my two friends with pure hearts.

Maybe I really am going to Hell.

• Bonus Pictures

I should write more and finish this story off in a proper sequential order, but I am still jet-lagged from coming back home, a little lazy, and this is Valentines day. I remember a V-day back in high school I was crying because I did not have a Valentine and I was trying so hard to get one. Man oh man. Reminds me of the several talks or three I have had with some good friends over my love life.

What love life you ask? None. Natta. I gave up on that stuff.

But I am not here to drown my sorrows on a beautiful and lonely night. So here are some final pictures of my trip with captions for my fans, if you read this far. By fans I mean my friends and curious onlookers.

Jon acting like a playa in his suit.

Me and Jon pimping it out.

Say cheese Dusty.

Another Jon at the dorm.

The two lovebirds, Dust and Janessa.

What was this guys name again?

The Lovebirds again

They do a little reinactmeant

Um, this was an ancient city in...I forget.

Cool man. Probably a Jesus sculputre in one of the sections of the Mormon temple tour.

The temple

All of us on the tour

All of us 2

Me and Jon in full shadow next to the temple

The temple lit up.

Dustan messed with my fro.

Sick artwork.

The conference hall thing, place.

Not bad, a tree.

Janessa, ahhh.

Hey Jesus, cool artwork.

Dustan unfocused. Does this mean he will die?

OK that is plenty. Kudos to everyone with a Valentine this day. Take it easy.

- Peace